Friday, January 05, 2007

A Few Moments (or Days) of Silence



I'm trying not to really think about it at all. Otherwise, I'll just sit here and cry. I'm crying typing.

Can I really send him away to a new home?

He was our first kitty. We got him before we were even married. He has the cutest little meow, the saddest little face. He likes to lick your hair and purrs so loudly when he's on your lap trying to read your book.

But he peed on my plant window. And the tile floor. And the wall behind the stove. The STOVE! I have to cook there!! All this after almost two months of re-training. If that didn't work, nothing will. It was honestly the last straw. The last three straws, really.

My sweet Iggy with a Hitler mustache. My tall kitty with big green eyes. He likes to play hide and seek around the house. He'll chase you up the stairs and then wait for you to turn around and chase him back. He can jump higher than any of the the other kitties.

I truly can't take him away myself. A friend is coming tomorrow to pick him up and "take him to find a new, happier future." I am accepting that as whatever it may be. I don't want to know. I am simply so grateful that she is willing to do this for me as she knows I can't do it.

Yep, crying while typing is hard to do. Sheesh, it's just a cat. Just a sweet, innocent kitty who never meant any harm. He doesn't mean to do what he does.

You may have to keep reminding me about the stove. Maybe every day for a while.

It feels like such a life-altering thing. And in a sense, it really is. There's this little body that has lived with us and who we've cared for for six years. No, he's not human, but that doesn't mean we haven't had a huge emotional attachment to him. There will be something missing from our lives. Something will truly change forever. I know I'll look back in a few years or months and not feel as I do now, and that knowing is what is helping me get through. Seems so silly that it's so huge but it is.

I will miss you, my sweet Iggy. We have loved you and cared for you and snuggled you. We have fed you and played with you and brushed your soft, glossy fur. We will cry for you and miss seeing you in your favorite spots. Oh dear, there I go crying again.

11 comments:

blog Portland said...

Maybe the cat was peeing everywhere because it knew what would happen, and it was trying to fulfill an urge to run free amongst the catnip and wild meow mix.

Jean said...

Oh Iggy. I'm sorry you have to give him away. He has been a big part of your family, even though he's a cat. Still..you gave him lots of affection and he did so in return. It really is ok to feel bad and miss him. You're a good mom. :)

Frannie Farmer said...

We are struggling with a similar pet issue right now. It is soo hard to make that final choice, regardless of the offence(s) ... good luck and let us know how it all works out.

Hillary said...

Oh Anne, I'm so sorry. I know how attatched we can get to our pets. I DREAD the day our dog dies. Big hugs to you.

Scrapnqueen said...

Hugs to you, Anne. I know how you feel--we had a dog that we had to give to someone else for her own good--too rambunctious to be cooped up anymore. I knew she would be happier and better off, but it was still so hard to give her up, and now that we have another husky-cross that reminds me so much of her, I miss her a lot some days. But I know she's happier where she is. (And I have to ask, is it her that I miss or the fact that she was actually house-trained?)

Kat said...

Awe Anne....sending you lots of cyberhugs. Been there - with an orange tabby named "Butterball."

Anonymous said...

I see this everyday working at a shelter. Housesoiling cats are not adoptable. They are put down. The fact that they sit in a cage stressed out prior to being euthanized makes me sick. I wish people would be kind and take the cat to the VET to have them put to sleep without putting the cat through the trauma of going to a shelter.....

Housesoiling is difficult and frustrating. And very common. And fixable. If you or anyone out there have a housesoiling cat and need advice your best best is to contact your local shelter or Vet right away to fix the problem. The longer you wait the harder it is to fix. Once you have literally done everything and then some to fix the problem then try rehoming the cat.....

"I truly can't take him away myself. A friend is coming tomorrow to pick him up and "take him to find a new, happier future." I am accepting that as whatever it may be."

So you have no idea where your beloved cat is going or who he is going to????? Who will take a cat that housesoils?? A farm maybe... But for a cat that is used to being an indoor pet (I am assuming he lives indoors) what kind of life is that? Is getting hit by a car better than being euthanized? Seriously- you just passed that responsibility off onto your friend- this is YOUR cat...

Well I guess in your words "Sheesh, it's just a cat".......

3-4 million cats & dogs are euthanized every year at shelters in the USA...

Scrapnqueen said...

Wow, like you needed that guilt trip...

anne said...

Apparently it's a good thing that I'm not recieving my comments by email anymore. (Not sure why)But I sure didn't need to read that.

My anonomous friend, if you knew anything about me or anything I had gone through you would not have said any of the things you did. You don't know me and you don't know my heart.

Anonymous said...

You are absolutely right. I wanted to delete it after I wrote it but there is no delete option. You are right. I don't know you. And I know it is a very difficult problem and that you probably did do everything to make it work. I just see the flip side of what happens after the cats that are given up everyday.... I was sad for the cat and should not have said anything.... I am deeply sorry. Really.

anne said...

Wow. Thank you. I honestly didn't expect you to respond back to me and I really appreciate it.

Trust me, I wouldn't have spent days crying over my cat if I didn't feel sorry for him too. I tried finding a farm for him, I tried finding someone with a garage they would let him live in.

He was more than just a cat to me, he was part of our family. It feels like we have a hole in the house now.

I'm the last person to ever want harm to come to an animal, especially a cat.

Anyway, thanks for the apology. Your comment still hurt, but it did help to hear where you were coming from. :)